Sunday 17 August 2008 at 07:49 am
I am a “fixer”, a “get things done” kind of guy, therefore I hate waiting. I mean I really hate waiting, but God has me in a waiting mode right now. God knows that I won’t wait if he doesn’t set things up so I am forced to wait, so now I wait. I can share some of the things I am waiting on others I can’t.
• Walnut Terrace: We should find out sometime in September if the City will receive the Hope VI grant. If they do then they will start the process of tearing down Walnut Terrace. They will tear it down either way the grant is what dictates the schedule. This will be the third large public housing they have torn down around me. I had only been in Halifax for a few months before they started moving everyone out. Chavis I was very involved I that community and walked through the whole process with my people. I think that Walnut Terrace will be the hardest. I have been in Walnut Terrace for 12 years. Many of the people that I worked with in Halifax and Chavis are in Walnut. I am waiting to see what the future of Walnut is before I decide how to carry out ministry there this fall. If they get the grant then I will just stay there myself and work with the families I know and hopefully have the kids in other clubs; however if they don’t get grant and it will be over a year before they do anything then I will hopefully have a fully staffed Kid’s Club there. So I wait
• Mission Trip: I leave for Asia on September 1 and will not return until September 11. There is so much I want to start in the Oaks and Raleigh North but I can’t start much until I return from overseas. People have a hard time understanding how I can be a “Minister of Missions” and not get excited about going overseas. I am not a normal “Minister of Missions”, my life is not short term work. I am not saying that makes me better than other “Ministers of Missions”, it does however make me different. Typically once I am on a plane heading for the mission trip I start to get excited. Right now all I can think of is that my ministry here is pretty much on hold. So I wait.
• Staff: Amy and George are, or at least should be, in full out job searching mode right now. When God provides them jobs my life is going to be greatly different. Let me give you an example, I came back from being in Louisville, Kentucky teaching a conference last week. When I came home I found school supplies sorted and bagged and ready for distribution. I hadn’t assigned that work, mainly because I was still brain dead from summer, but Amy and George knew what had to be done and took the initiative to handle school supplies. I have put one salary in my budget for next year, but not sure what the chance of getting that salary is in reality. We are looking at other means to reestablish a staff in the near future but not sure about those likelihoods either. So I wait.
"Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth." -- Psalms 46:10
Tuesday 12 August 2008 at 8:29 pm
If anyone tells you that teaching at a conference after summer is restful I can testify that person is a liar. That is not saying that God didn’t show up and speak to me at the conference, because he did. I was just so exhausted afterwards that I slept all the way from Kentucky to West Virginia on the way home.
Monday I just sat in my recliner and played with blocks.
Tuesday was a good day. I eased backed into work starting by meeting with Amy, Jess and George then meeting the food bank team when they got back followed by Raleigh North Youth Nite.
I love Youth Nite. It was so good to be back with my kids and youth. Raleigh North Youth Nite is at the early stage with this group of youth. I sometimes wonder if I have the strength to start another youth group, but once I show up on site and I get with these kids some searching for Christ, some taking stumbling first steps as Christians, a couple growing in Christ and bunch there for snacks and to get on the computers I know that I am in the center of God’s will. I love the honesty of at-risk youth. I was trying to get them to friend me on Myspace tonight, only 3 out of 17 agreed. I was later talking to them about how they shouldn’t have anything on their pages that they wouldn’t want me to see. Aylaza said there’s nothing on my page that I don’t want you to see I just don’t want you as my friend.
The next few days I will be doing an important part of the ministry but not my favorite part of the ministry, writing budgets and planning. Please pray for me during the rest of this week as I work on these important items.
So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. (1Peter 5:6 - 9 NLT)
I Love These Guys:
Sunday 10 August 2008 at 06:28 am
The conference went very well. God really has some things moving in Multihousing on a national level. We still have a long way to go but it is good to see a few steps in the right direction.
As always when I get away God speaks to me and prepares me for the next step He has for my life. I hope that I can be bold enough to follow His lead.
It was a blessing to have a few days off with my wife and to see her step up and be that beautiful servant that she is at the conference.
I know this is short but we are in WV and I need to get on the road to my Mission Field!
I will write more later.
Friday 08 August 2008 at 06:38 am
We spent the morning at the Lexington Horse Park. Kristi had a great time seeing horses and petting them. Growing up around farms seeing horses was not that novel of an experience for me but I learn some things and had a great time watching Kristi have a great time. I had lunch at White Castle, I share that for Kyle. We then headed to Louisville, where the conference is this weekend. So we headed downtown to find something to eat and spontaneously ended up on a steam powered paddle wheel boat on the Ohio River. It was fantastic the only negative was I left my camera in the room. Afterwards we went to Joe’s Crab Shack for dinner and that was very good.
I started off this meeting with a great one on one meeting with Neal Hughes that was very encouraging. We spent the time in prayer and brainstorming, vision sharing and encouragement. Good times. The next two days will be very busy for me but I will try to share each night.
Here is Kristi at the horse farm:
Thursday 07 August 2008 at 05:23 am
Kristi and I took off on Wednesday to Louisville, KY where I will teach at a conference at Southern Semiary.
The first stop was at Huntington, WV where we lived for 2 years while Kristi was in Grad school. We visited old Haunts and got caught in a downpour that caused a flash flood that allowed me to drive our jeep through flood streets.
We at ate at Jim's Steak and Spaghetti Restaurant. It opened in 1938 and has been ran by Jim or his son for 70 years now. JFK ate there when he was campaigning in WV. IBM, CISCO, AT&T and other cooperations have been known to bring there executives there to see an example of a well run business.
We are off to see the Horse Park this morning and hopefully make it to the Louisville Slugger Museum this aftenoon.
Hers a picture:
Sunday 03 August 2008 at 3:27 pm
I remember a great song by Pink Floyd; it was on The Wall, called Comfortably Numb. What a great description of the 21 century American Christian. The song talks about how the artist had lost his dream and the only way he could keep performing was through drugs that kept him “Comfortably Numb”. In our country and our time we are kept “Comfortably Numb” by our own drug. The drug is called success. We’ve lost our dream of making a difference in the world. We sit back and build buildings, carpet them, buy bigger and better stuff to put into the buildings. We count attendance, we count baptisms, we count money, we count degrees, we count buildings, and we forget to count what God counts—Changed Lives.
We sit on our padded pews tripping on success and comfort and don’t notice our neighbors, family, or even whole communities of people living their life without the Truth-Life-Way.
Compassion? -- Let a desperate man knock on our Lexus window needing help! Our idea of compassion is to hire or sub-contract out taking care of the poor. Sacrifice?—Sitting at home watching re-runs of Godless shows with the rest of the world. Charity?—Donating pure Junk and only that if there is a tax receipt nearby. Love? -- Eros abounds, we love beauty and fame and fortune even to lust. Philia we love our families to level of idolatry; hiding from ministry behind that love. Agapē our language doesn’t even have an equivalent word.
Dear God please move us beyond the days of Habakkuk before we must “Look at the nations and watch— and be utterly amazed. For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told.” (Habakkuk 1:5)
Here are the Lyrics to Comfortably Numb”
Hello.
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone home?
Come on, now.
I hear you’re feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.
Relax.
I need some information first.
Just the basic facts:
Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ships smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can’t hear what you’re sayin.
When I was a child I had a fever.
My hands felt just like two balloons.
Now I got that feeling once again.
I cant explain, you would not understand.
This is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.
Ok.
Just a little pinprick. [ping]
There’ll be no more --aaaaaahhhhh!
But you may feel a little sick.
Can you stand up?
I do believe its working good.
That’ll keep you going for the show.
Come on its time to go.
There is no pain, you are receding.
A distant ships smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I cant hear what you’re sayin.
When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse,
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone.
I cannot put my finger on it now.
The child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.
Monday 28 July 2008 at 9:22 pm
So today I got a chance to see Destiny! It was the first time since Damian’s funeral. I was able to pull her to the side and chat with her for a moment or too.
It was an answer to prayer.
I exhausted and burned out but this week got off of an amazing start.
Just a short entry to the point and not very deep but here is a couple pictures of me getting to love on Sissy (Destiny)
Sunday 27 July 2008 at 08:14 am
Blessings:
What a blessing me and the MR summer staff received from the last team. They really loved on us at a time that we needed it. Sometimes Mission Teams don’t seem to get that while this is their one week here, and we praise God for them, that it may be our fourth or sixth or even eighth week here. This past team did a great job of just loving my staff as they loved our Kids. They did not complain or fuss or ignore them, instead they embraced them. They did not look down on them instead they used them as the resource they have the ability to be. The encouragement has given us the strength to face the final week coming up.
The Second Law of Thermodynamics:
The Second Law (Law of Energy Decay) states that every system left to its own devices always tends to move from order to disorder, its energy tending to be transformed into lower levels of availability, finally reaching the state of complete randomness and unavailability for further work. -- Scientific Creationism, edited by Henry Morris (p.25)
Wow I may be living proof of the second law of Thermodynamics right now especially, finally reaching the state of complete randomness and unavailability for further work. This week is going to be a challenge for me and I covet your prayers. I past Burned Out sometime last week. When asked what do I do when I am burned out I always reply, “I serve burned out.” I can not find anywhere in scripture where saying we are burned out is an excuse to stop serving. My favorite verse dealing with being burned out is: We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. -- 2 Corinthians 4: 8 – 9. I am tired of whinny Christians who quit every time things get hard. Suck it up and Serve was our rallying cry a few years ago.
An Uneasy Peace:
It may sound like a contradiction but God has given me an uneasy peace. I realize that I am going to have to shut down mission points at the end of summer. I hate shutting down Mission Points; I usually have to cry myself to sleep when I do. I have a peace that can only come from God that I can not keep living my life spread so thin. I do not have peace that people of God can be content with letting me shut down sites. How can the Church just turn their back on the Lost. I don’t know much but I know when God speaks! So I have a peace that can only come from obedience. I will do what God has told be to do but I don’t like it. I will scale back the work in Walnut Terrace and the Oaks but I will not shut them down I will not give up on them. I will continue to beg God to shake up the believers in Raleigh. I will shut down Valleybrook and I can not reopen Terrace Park or Stonecrest and I can not start Dover or Mayview.
I may shut down but I will not shut up! I will continue being God’s advocate for reaching these mission fields!
Sunday 20 July 2008 at 08:24 am
I grew up with a book in my hand. I started studying writing in 1984, the next year I was the editor of our College’s Literary Magazine. I was published in my first Scholarly Journal in 1992. I don’t write this in pride. I write this in utter humility as I try to express an emotion and I can not find words or a medium worthy of expressing where I am right now,
This week I have stood on two properties that I do not see how I am going to continue them after summer is over in two weeks. I have pleaded with people in my church to step up with not result. I have pleaded with other Churches to step up with no result. I have pleaded to the State Convention for help with no result. I feel confused and helpless. My wife can tell how hard it is weighing on me. I get futile support telling me “You can’t do it all.” “One church can’t reach all the apartments.” “Don’t worry God’s in control.” Yet, it is me who has to stand on that Mission Point and look Robert in the eyes and say, “I wish we could have a youth group for you but I can’t find anyone to teach it.” Or explain to Damian, “I’m trying my best to find someone to run youth night here”, then attend his funeral one week later.
How can we as followers of Christ set and watch Scrubs reruns and not answer the clear call of God to reach the Lost. We hide behind our families; we hide behind our schedules and go about our everyday life as people die without Christ. As I stand on that hill or at that basketball court, or the circle where the road ends, my mind rushes back to that first time God called me there. The kids, youth and adults who I saw God save are overwhelmed by the masses who have not accepted Jesus as Boss of their lives.
I stand there helpless as the tears fall and I beg God not to make me shut down another Mission Point. I then I leave with a heavy depression that comes from this compassion that God has given me and the world, and even the Church, expects me to go on as if nothing is wrong.
Then Jesus made a circuit of all the towns and villages. He taught in their meeting places, reported kingdom news, and healed their diseased bodies, healed their bruised and hurt lives. When he looked out over the crowds, his heart broke. So confused and aimless they were, like sheep with no shepherd. "What a huge harvest!" he said to his disciples. "How few workers! On your knees and pray for harvest hands!"
-- Matthew 9: 35-38 (The Message)
Sunday 20 July 2008 at 05:02 am
Inspired by Ashley and the rest of Nate's team I am going to do my best to blog daily for the next two weeks.
I was wiped out this weekend and woke up this morning feeling very sick. I am feeling much better now by the way.
It has been an amazing summer and we are not done it. God has blessed me with a great staff. They have grown so much this summer, even if other people don't see it.
We have had four great teams so far this summer with two more on the way.
Pray for Kenny's Team and Nate's team. Pray for the MR staff that we have the strength to finish the summer strong